When my mind picks a TV franchise to dream about, most of the time it picks Star Trek.  And 90% of those dreams involve characters from The Next Generation.  But a couple nights ago I had the most vivid, memorable Star Trek dream I’ve ever had, and my unconscious came up with something I’ve long considered: a Star Trek Voyager movie.

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Voyager was always a little cheesier than TNG and DS9. It was kind of ridiculous how all the shit that went down in the last episode would be magically forgiven by the next.  My dream took Voyager and made it a little more epic and dark yet still maintained that feeling of campy humor.

But wait a minute, you’re saying – didn’t Voyager get back to Earth in the series finale?  What dramatic story is left to tell?  Well, my mind set the story in the alternate timeline from Endgame where it took 22 years for Voyager to get back to the Alpha Quadrant instead of 7.  And that’s where our story begins!

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It’s been 20 years and Janeway is tired of being Captain – she wants to “retire” and let others take the reins.  Chakotay and Tuvok don’t want the job.  Her choices have been narrowed down to Seven of Nine and B’Elana Torres because each has displayed that they care more about the survival of the ship and the “family” than about themselves.  Janeway considers this to be the most important Captainly quality after two decades in the Delta Quadrant.

And since Star Trek episodes always have to have two concurrent plots, all the male members of the crew manage to get infected by a virus that fucks up their Y chromosomes and they’re placed in stasis pods by the Doctor.  Voyager finds refuge in a dense asteroid field where all the rock faces have been carved out, resembling Mesa Verde or Petra.  The Doctor scoffs at the ritual medicine of the shamanistic alien race that inhabits the area but comes to realize that the rituals mask advanced technology that might as well be magic.

Meanwhile, we get flashbacks of the memories that explain why Janeway is considering Seven and B’Elana.  The first story is an away mission where Seven and Chakotay are climbing over rocky, arid terrain.  It becomes clear from their banter that at some point they got married but are now divorced.  Seven discovers that the mysterious planet they’re investigating is actually a trap set by a bunch of the races they’ve pissed off over the years.  Seven attempts to sacrifice herself to save Voyager, Chakotay won’t let her, and the ship escapes because of course Seven can manipulate any technology however she wants.

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For B’Elana, Janeway remembers a Borg attack where Voyager’s shields went down just long enough for the Borg to abduct B’Elana’s preteen daughter.  Janeway wants to take the ship on a potentially suicidal mission to rescue her but B’Elana is willing to sacrifice her daughter rather than put the ship in so much danger.  Janeway puts B’Elana on house arrest to keep her from interfering but B’Elana somehow shuts off the warp drive from the food replicator in her quarters.  Janeway thinks this is so bad ass that she allows B’Elana to come up with a plan with Paris and Kim where they fool the Borg into thinking Voyager is actually a ship full of holographic black and white 1920s gangsters.  Ethan Phillips (Neelix) gets in the movie by basically playing the same role he did in Star Trek: First Contact.

At the end of the movie the Doctor has solved the medical emergency, but it’s unclear who Janeway has chosen as the new captain.  She’s standing at the console behind the Captain’s chair in civilian clothing and the camera zooms and rotates in on her face as her voiceover narrates, “We’ve scraped and clawed and fought our way back for 20 years.  But we’re almost home!”  Voyager leaves the asteroid field, which resolves into the title:

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As the Trans-Siberian Orchestra style remix  of the Voyager theme swells (think a mix of this and this) and the credits roll, the camera zooms out to show the Delta Quadrant, then warps through the path they’ve been on, starting with the Caretaker’s Array and then the Hirogen, Species 8472, etc.  Then we get to see the path still in front of them – a Borg base, a Romulan fleet about to face off with a Federation fleet, and finally zooming in on Earth and San Francisco.  The bonus scene is Reginald Barclay waking up in a sweat, bolting upright in bed, and remarking “No, that’s too crazy…”

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I guess Neelix also gets in the movie as Neelix the cat?

Well, I tried to recall as much detail as I could – I’m frankly amazed the plot makes as much sense as it does given the source.  Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it!

Image Credits: Paramount, lofty1985 at DeviantArt

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